Lights, Camera, Action
by manywingedescape
Summary: Rachel Berry was always a fantastic actress. Except when it came to Quinn.


**Title: **Lights, Camera, Action

**Summary:** Rachel Berry was always a fantastic actress. Except when it came to Quinn.

**Spoilers: ** On My Way

**Disclaimer:** I do not own a thing, if I did there wouldn't be a Finchel ring.

**Author's Note: **This is actually just a ficlet, basically in Rachel's head, set during the hallway scene in 3X14, but I'm posting it anyways.

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><p>Rachel Berry was always a fantastic actress.<p>

Sometimes she played it up so that people thought she wasn't so great at it, but when it came down to the real things, Rachel could out-act them all.

That's why, standing in the hall across from Quinn Fabray, Rachel put on her best charm and acted.

"When you were singing that song, you were singing it to Finn, and only Finn, right?"

Rachel wanted to shake her head, say no. Say that she was fighting all these feelings. To say that she didn't actually want to marry Finn, that _no, you shouldn't put on the bridesmaids dress and support this, Quinn. _

But Rachel was an actress, and she knew the path she had to take, the one without Quinn Fabray. So, instead, she nodded her head. It was barely perceivable, but she nodded none the less. Then pretended that she didn't see Quinn's world dim a little in those hazel eyes. And that it didn't dim a little in her own.

Quinn Fabray had been the only one to break the flawless act Rachel had going. While Rachel found the path that was for her, singing in Glee club, marrying the jock, finally becoming someone, Quinn was the one who changed the plan. Rachel wasn't supposed to love her.

It's not that Rachel didn't want to love a girl, she'd grown up with two gay dad's, that was never the problem. It was that it was Quinn.

Finn was comfortable, he was safe. A little stifling, maybe, but he loved her. And she did love him. And they would grow older together, have children, she'd have the typical life. The one she always dreamed of.

But Quinn… Quinn was the wild card. The what if. What if she took that chance? That one choice that wasn't in the original plan?

Quinn was the face she saw when she thought of happiness. When she thought of things on an extreme scale. She'd hated Quinn at one point. Now she loved her. Extreme opposites.

Rachel could picture days where fights would reach alarming levels, screams, with someone throwing things, the neighbours complaining. But then she could picture nights where they would make up, where the sound reached past loud again, but for a different reason this time.

Quinn Fabray was the extreme definition of untamed love.

Of no concrete future. And that's why Rachel couldn't have her.

She was going to go and do amazing things, things she'd been planning since she was a child. Practically since she was born. A plan that included Finn. It had always included Finn.

So, she was going to do this. She was going to marry him. Put on the face she'd perfected over the last year. The love-struck eyes. The dopey smile. The _oh yes, I love him with all my heart, he's my soulmate_ expression.

It killed her, but it was right. There wasn't room for error. This was the way it was, wasn't it?

And then Quinn was smiling, a look more beautiful than anything the brunette had ever seen, saying that she wanted to be there for her. And Rachel knew in that moment that neither of them wanted this. Neither of them wanted this wedding.

But Rachel was an actress, and right now she hated herself for putting so much time and effort into the charade.

There was a laugh, and then a hug. And the hug was a goodbye. It said everything they never dared to speak. An "I wish you weren't doing this," "please stop me," "I love you," "please don't let go," "I'm sorry."

And while she wanted to break, Rachel held her mask. She could do this, she reminded herself, she was an actress.

However, Rachel's acting would slip later that evening. When Santana's phone lit up with a phone call from a distraught Judy Fabray calling from the hospital. This time she didn't bother to put the mask back on. Instead she stumbled into the first pair of arms she could find and cried.


End file.
